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For my YBP ladies: Are you ready to make some changes in the way you approach relationships? If you know that something needs to change, but you’re not exactly sure what, then let me offer some guidance. Here are 5 Relationship Resolutions for you to consider:

Learn to say “Next!”
She may “not know ‘bout” grammar, but Beyonce has a point. To the left, to the left. In other words, tell your ex to move aside for the next! Plain and simple, the world is full of men. Everywhere you turn, there’s a man. Look – there goes one now! A wise woman once told me that men are like city buses: If you miss one, there will always be another (even if you have to wait a little while). Decide for yourself how much meaning you assign a man, and how early you will allow yourself to get attached or be vulnerable. You will find love again, so let it go, and do not worry that you will end up in a rocking chair surrounded by cats and empty wine bottles. There will always be another man, and more importantly, if you surround yourself with family and friends who love you, your life will be very fulfilling.

Expect more and tolerate less
Not all men are self-loathing, egocentric, cheating bastards. In fact, most people have a lot more good to them than bad, and by and large, will live up to the expectations you set for them. You may not worry about friends hurting or disappointing you, but with men, that fear more than likely lingers in your mind. That’s because of expectations. If you do not expect – or even demand – that a man treat you right, then he probably won’t. I’m not talking about over the top nit-picky stuff like buying you dinner or calling by Tuesday if he wants to see you on Saturday. I’m talking about basic good treatment, the stuff you deserve in a relationship, like following through with plans, or being aware of your feelings. Simple common consideration. And what happens when common consideration is breached? Next!

Get busy
Because men are wired differently and may as well live in a different time zone, playing the “why hasn’t he called?” game is a guaranteed express trip to Crazytown. Why hasn’t he called? Who knows? Maybe he’s busy with work or school. Maybe he’s got a lot on his mind. Or maybe (just maybe) he’s “just not that into you.” Whatever the case may be, you should be too busy to worry about it. Resolve to make plans, resurrect your hobbies, and spend your time doing and thinking and being. If he calls, great! If not, oh well. You will be way too occupied with all of your fabulous self-fulfillment to even notice.

Don’t just play it cool
To keep ourselves from feeling exposed and vulnerable, we women sometimes say the phrase, “that’s okay” when it was really, really not okay. How many times have you resisted the urge to get angry when you had reason to, for fear of coming off as too emotional or unhinged. I say it’s time to forget about those fears and reservations. If something is bothering you, speak your mind! Don’t just automatically say “that’s okay,” or “nothing” when asked what’s wrong. If the situation calls for it, and the difference between sucking it up and having a bit of a blowup could be months of festering in a foul mood, then let him have it. The same goes for positive emotions. If a man does something to please you, then act pleased. Forget cool sophistication! Remember communication is key! And if he gets weirded out by all of your emoting? You guessed it: Next!

Love yourself
During your quest to please and cater to your man, don’t ever forget how beautiful, funny, smart, and talented you are. Getting caught up in the worry of trying to please a man, and working overtime to postpone an inevitable breakup is a huge time-waster. A man’s opinion of you is not more important than your opinion of yourself, so don’t take it so seriously. Remember to laugh more, worry less and like who you are – man or no man – and redirect some of that energy into pleasing yourself. Know yourself, love yourself, and be truly happy with yourself. You might find that you enjoy dating yourself more than dating your man.

Happy New Year, and think positive in 2007!