I know. It is early. I am just as bad as the retailers hawking deals already, right?
Friends, this is my absolute favorite time of year. The music, the red and green, family plans, opportunities to give back, Eggnog (I’m grown, so spiked!), and warm drinks at night (yes, even in Miami).
More than that, I believe in Christmas cheer. Yet, lots of things are happening right now and being reported that do not seem to reinforce that we operate so much better when given messages of hope and possibility, than despair and fear.
The very birth and life many celebrate this season is inspiring and instructive. Jesus’ life was a testament to inner peace, unfailing faith, and giving even in personally dangerous times. When the burden was heaviest the call was highest to remember who he was, and why he was. Whatever our beliefs, the questions remain: who will I be in the face of debt collectors? In the presence of those in need? When economic news and gift-giving pressure become metaphorical crowns of thorns?
Beyond anything physical, one of our greatest gifts is our Spirit. If we act from our intrinsic Spirit of love, forgiveness, and generosity, our energy lifts us and those around us. When light comes on in a room it touches (most) everything. How do you feel when your warm smile at the grocery store or a “hello” on the street gets you a smile right back? How would you react if your roommate, family member or spouse left a sticky note that says “thank you” or “I love you” or “I was just thinking about you?” Maybe you cannot get away to FL, DC or CA where your family is this Holiday, but how nice would it be if you put one card in the mail to Mom or your little sister every day for 7 days so that around Christmas-time the person you loved kept receiving messages of joy and warmth?
Be kind, patient and generous with yourself, too. Take time out to detach from the news at your job, the local city council, the nation and the world. Be with your Self. Energize your Spirit. Is it a quiet walk alone or with the dog? Is it classical music, a good book or a glass of wine? Is it sitting on the porch with sweet tea looking out over the neighborhood? Is it journaling? A relaxing bath? Is it one day you take off and tell friends, family and work “no phone! no email! no blackberry! no apologies?” Give yourself some time away from the routine. Something that reminds you that you are not a service module, Mom-bot, or Mr. Fix-Everything!
Life, I think, is simpler than it appears. I have a closet full of gifts that, while sparkly and cool when I got them, are collecting dust. What I remember are the perfectly selected cards that seemed to have been written about me. What I remember are the long, honest conversations I had been avoiding or taking for granted would happen. The pictures that were sent to me that I forgot about. Or the teddy bears at Pottery Barn that friend and I bought and promised to keep no matter where we were (mine a wine color, hers a deep, forest green).
This season, with its capacity for celebration and sharing, might not mean much if our approach is heavy or plodding. If you do not enjoy being “back home” or with this or that person during the Holidays, I think you owe it to yourself to be where you will be lifted up and encouraged. If now might be a good opportunity to mend a broken relationship or practice releasing and letting go of old tensions – take that first step. It will be a gift to you and to the person to whom it is directed. If you cannot give presents the way you are accustomed or expected, be honest about that to yourself and others. That kind of openness can lead to new levels of sharing and understanding with the ones you love.
It is never too early to start picturing all the ways you can be a blessing. It is never too early to remember that tomorrow is not promised. Each of us has the ability, right now, to be a gift. Start using GoodSearch.com and donate to a charity with every internet search. Maybe you do not feel comfortable giving money to the homeless. Perhaps buy a box of ramen noodles, individual cereals, or protein bars for your car; they can be handed out of the window quickly and easily. Maybe you do not like being on the phone. How about a hand-written letter on nice stationary? You are the gift, however you choose to express it.
And, there is one gift you can give me a month early. Take one moment, and with it take a deep breath…
If you feel comfortable, close your eyes, and take one more breath and really deeply breathe…
That is what matters. The way that breath connects you to all living things. The way it pauses the mental tussling. The way it fills the heart with peace. I cannot help but think that is what this season means.
Copyright © 2008 Garry Bevel
PS3
For me Christmas is a time to just spend with the family! I also love warm dirnks at night and the whole festive feeling. It's briliant!
November 26, 2008 at 9:42 am
Give Me THE GIFT | Open_Secrets
[...] of the gift-giving season. As we wander the malls, the boutiques and the Internet looking for those perfect gifts, let’s not forget one of the gifts that serves the soul – honest [...]
December 4, 2008 at 5:06 pm
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